Most women have a Mother in law. Most do not believe the stories about mine. I am hoping to prove that she is, in fact, bat shit crazy.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Loves the holidays...
She finds it necessary to have separate celebratory salt and pepper shakers for each recognized holiday. She has repeatedly attempted to pass this tradition down to is.
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Once mailed me...
Cleaning products. With sticky notes attached to them instructing me on what parts of my house were dirty and which product to use where.
Keeps in touch with people...
She was nice enough to send my husbands ex-girlfriend birthday gifts AFTER my husband and I were married. (is that weird??? It isn't like they were even friends anymore after the break up...)
Loves helping me decorate...
She gave me a magazine this week full of home decor items. She said it was "the kind of stuff you like." These are ACTUAL photos from said magazine. 
Likes good entertainment...
Once bought tickets for us (me, my husband, and herself) to go to a dinosaur show that involved puppets. We were the only people there without a child or a mentally handicapped person. :(
Is concerned about her grandkids...
She once yelled at my cousin in law "quit fucking cussing in front of the damn babies!!" (said at the dinner table.... In front of the "damn babies").
Loves going to the post office...
She consistently sends us things that cost more to ship than purchase.
Is interested in her sons colleagues...
She is convinced that since he is in the Army that he knows EVERYONE in the Army.
Tries to spot celebrities...
She is convinced that ANY bus or RV on the interstate may be carrying famous people... Even the ones that say greyhound.
Is great at social gatherings...
She NEVER stands awkwardly in the distance staring and not talking to anyone.... And she NEVER got a bunch of kids drunk at a wedding reception by putting jello shots (yeah... Jello shots!) next to the cookies on the dessert table. NEVER...
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
likes to share her love of cooking...
She has given us no less than three (3) fondue pots over the past 4 years.
used to be one tough cookie...
She CLAIMS to have once smashed a car up with a baseball bat in a fit of rage (her own car), stabbed someone with a fork (her sister), and shot someone (we don't know who that was). Now she is too scared to drive on the interstate.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
encourages me to be a "good wife"...
When I was about 6 months pregnant with our first son, my MIL was kind enough to give me a pamphlet (circa. 1955) that explained that I need to reapply my makeup shortly before my husband gets home from work and make sure that my hair is done appropriately....... She had highlighted that part of it for me. :)
appreciates art...
At the YMCA in our old town there is a huge mural on the wall in the pool area. She stood at the windows for an hour staring at it. When my husband got out of the pool she asked him why the man climbing the rock wall by the pool was not moving. 
enjoys a good party...
In fact, the first time I met her she had soooo much fun she peed on herself and passed out drunk. I think that last game of flip cup did it for her....
Monday, October 24, 2011
likes to re-purpose things...
Was upset that I did not feel the strong urge to use a green bowling ball bag from the 1970s as my diaper bag for my first born child.....
is an avid gardener...
Her neighbors went out of town. She was kind enough to go to their house and plant fake flowers in their yard (without their knowledge). Plastic flowers. In the ground. ??? Thoughts....
is here....
Quote of the Day: "The only reason they still have Dancing with the Stars on the air is so that maybe one day Cher will come and sit in the audience..... Because she is a very important person." -My MIL (This quote requires no background information because she simply stated this out of the blue while we are all eating dinner.)
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